Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Hemorrhoids are painful

Hemorrhoids are dilated or bulging veins of the rectum and anus, caused by increased pressure in the rectal veins. The causes of hemorrhoids include: habitual straining, coughing, sneezing, pregnancy, and prolonged sitting. While watching President Obama's first Presidential Address to Congress, it became apparent that Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi suffers like 57% of America with hemorrhoids. She seemed uncomfortable during the long oratory, and took any advantage to stand and relieve her sore seat-warmer. Even the extremely excitable Vice President Joe Biden didn't see the need of standing as many times as Speaker Pelosi.


We have witnessed our representatives suffer from other health ailments during long speeches previously. Both former Vice President Cheney and former President Bill Clinton suffer from narcolepsy, having difficulty remaining awake. Former President George H. W. Bush's battle with bulimia was apparent during a state dinner with Japanese Prime Minister. Nancy Pelosi is not alone. I highly suggest Analpram or the ever popular, Preparation H. And if she starts treatment today, she may survive the State of the Union address in several months.

4 comments:

Jen said...

I am so sorry I missed the address. I've been trying to catch up with the highlights today, but it's all been via. the ever evil, right-winged conspiracy, radio stations so I'm sure I didn't get a clear picture. I just wish one of them would have been as keen as you to pick up the ailment she is apparently suffering from. That's hilarious!

okbushmans said...

I did pick up something other than hemorrhoids. I haven't read the transcript yet, which I usually do. So I'm just going off my ever-unreliable memory. Here were some of my thoughts:

- Pres. Obama is setting up a team or organization that will oversee the stimulus package. I know VP Biden is in charge, but he mentioned others. I think this is a GREAT and obvious idea. It was infuriating that Bush really didn't do it with the bailouts, and we see how much oversight was needed.

- He proposed something similar to the G.I. Bill after WWII, which again, I think is a great idea. I don't know the details of either then or now, but I think the more we can do for those who sacrifice so much for our country, the better.

- He talked a lot about 3 things:
~Energy
~Health Care (you already know my thoughts)
~Education (which I think needs A LOT of fixing and funding).

-He also promised to reduce the deficit, which I think the best way to reduce your debts is to CUT YOUR SPENDING!!! It seems a little early to make promises about cutting the deficit in half in your first term, only a week after you passed the most expensive piece of legislation in HISTORY! And there are more spending bills to follow. And yet, 95% of us will have "no new taxes". The last man who promised that did have to go back on his word, and raise taxes. I don't see any other way to cut the deficit in half, other than reduce spending and raise taxes.

Those were my pure, unGlenn Becked thoughts (I missed the radio this morning, and haven't turned on the tv). Pres Obama is an excellent and engaging speaker. I planned on skipping through it, but I actually listened to every word (I did skip through all the applause). There were obvious points I absolutely disagree with, but there was some there I think he is on the right track. Very interesting to see what happens after his first 100 days.

Ashley said...

So funny!
I, too, am interested to see how President Obama will cut the deficit in half without raising taxes. Hmmm...
He is enjoyable to watch, though.

Jen said...

The only radio guy I got in today was Prager. He really praised Obama for his speech and enthusiasm and inspiration. He compared it to Jindall who he said was scripted and boring. That's why I like Prager, he calls it for how he sees it, no excuses and a lot of fairness. He did say, however, that while Obama was eloquent and great to listen to, he was alarmed by the message. One example, NOT an exact quote, "Our Country will not survive if we do not stop depending on for sources of energy." Prager went on to say, almost sarcastically, are we really NOT going to survive, that is so ridiculous. America has so much oil that we aren't allowed to drill, and somehow we are NOT going to SURVIVE if we continue to rely on foreign oil. It was pretty funny, he just said it seemed really dramatic to make such a death-defying statement. But, I only heard snippets of the speech and so I really can't comment on the content.